Today is not what is to come.

overview: sudden midnight urge to write, and just because a friend, a special one, of mine said it was a good phrase.

We are familiar with situations like being paranoid about something, or just simply worried about someone a thousand kilometres apart, because you have a knotted feeling in your stomach. We are also aware that in the modern world, kids who's been affected by the media, social networks, and the rising numbers of bullying lowers their self-cofidence and -image of themselves. These events usually make one so confident, so strong in their social life, and within themselves turn away and change to the weakest and doubtful of beings.

How, then, can something that seems so simple, something that we can look past, not-so-easily in some cases, cause a person to breakdown inside? When someone starts getting criticise... Wait, not that. When someone starts caring about being criticised, they start noticing their flaws. That's how simple it looks, but no. It isn't their flaws that they notice, it is the possible flaw that they think other people see in them. This is a big part, but not a major effect. The problem isn't about caring about it, it's when they start to generate possibilities caused by these possible-flaws. Take a case example (no, this is not a true story case); A boy thinks that his friends talk behind his back. He then starts to brainstorm the faults he has done. In the next few weeks, he would just assume that they don't like him and think to himself "Okay if I talk to him, he'd ditch me. If I talk to her, she'd tell them I was a freak". This way of thought process will then build up, to paranoia, and will get larger and create a delusional section of the mind, and make every move of the subject something against you.

Back to reality. When reality of the boy is that his friends are as normal as a sunny day, and that an event has made this boy to detach himself from what we know as society, and try to blame it on to another source. Another possibility is that, his friends are still as normal as a sunny day, but he has done a fault, something he regrets greatly that in his eyes, it would change his friendship, while in his friends' eyes, it's just a common mistake, something they look past. This tends to cause people to be a perfectionists on the good side, but also depressed on the bad side, this is just because we're scared to confront our own problems and friends and assume what is to come. We tend to overload with the possible outcome but not the definite outcome.

Does society have an age limit as to what it victimizes?

This was a post I wrote for my other blog. Since that one isn't active, and this one is one of my best writings, I'm reposting it here. I posted this on (20-11-2011).

Don't ask how I will start this, or what exactly this -blog- will be about. Just several viewpoints of the world, starting from one most ignored subject, suicide. I was browsing through my facebook page when I saw one of the newsfeeds, and it says '10 year old possible suicide victims'. I personally find self-harming/bullying/depression an act of violence from society towards an individual, so I was outraged by this news.

http://yhoo.it/v3Cg8V ; this is the link to the article if you want to know how outraged I was.

Here I start. In fact, I don't know how to start, the fact on how much disgusted I am to society, or the fact that suicide is not the only answer.

If you've read from my other blog, you'd know my experiences, and I think I mentioned the Golden Gate Bridge documentary, if not then, it's a documentary implying the people that commits suicide there annually.

Well here's the thing, one of the worst enemies of society is bullying (my definition; the act of negatively criticising others without any basic knowledge/relationship about the person), in fact it's probably the worst enemy of society. Like the 2010 incident of 5 or 6 gays committed suicide because of cyber bullying. It hurts you know, to hear these news, it really does. I mean how, do you think, how can people do such things? are they not sane enough to think of the consequences?

Generally, when people hear the word 'abuse' they'll think of physical; hit, smack, kick, punch, you name it. Yes it's painful. Yes it's torturous. Yes it's inappropriate. Yes it is so out of the blue that it should be stopped! no shit right? But let me enlighten another perspective, if physical abuse is the majority knowledge, does that mean there are no other types of abuses? Emotional abuse, this is THE one abuse that I think hurts more. Everyone's been there right? family pressure, peer pressure. they affect your moods, psychological effect on yourself and towards others.

Have you ever thought, after one incident, or an argument you feel like killing that other person just because they don't agree with you? This is not abuse, but it relates, this is you defending your stand-point. You arguing on what you think is right. Now, emotional abuse is when, you're the topic of argument, but this time without a positive view, someone confronting you with your flaws, insulting you, irritating you. This is emotional abuse, or as we know it; bullying.

People usually wonder, or should I say 'Friends' usually wonder, why I defend someone who's not social being bullied by my own 'friends' they don't understand, sadly, the correlation between abuse and self-harming. These are obvious victims, while mostly we've heard that victims of self-harming are people that 'always smiles, is joyful and easy-going'. Life is not as easy as ABC. So you still ask, why I defend them? I love them. Love in the context of being faithful to humanity, to the world we are in.

Let's just get to the point, suicide. When we hear news about suicide, most of us goes like 'he's stupid for doing that.' or 'It's wrong to commit suicide'. YES, it IS wrong, YES it IS stupid, but then again, why don't we ask 'WHY did he do that?' No? never thought of it? okay. Fine, that's how the world is, maybe I can't change everyone's views, but nothing can stop me, nor can't I enlighten people with the different perspectives. At least, to see that suicide is not fully self-inflicted damage. See the news article for example, she was still 10 for god's sake. TEN-effing-YEARS-OLD! she was called 'fat, ugly, slut' she DIDN'T even know what 'slut' meant, she HAD to endure all of that, ALL of that, and decided to end her life? I got some feedbacks saying she was 10, she didn't understand it. Oh trust me, I understood more than suicide at that age. more than that.

So why? Like I said, emotional abuse, not everyone can cope with the toughness of the reality. Not everyone. The image of 'the act of ending one's life' is a low-classed humanity right? what does that make of the criminals? the bullies? higher than them? no.

So here's the thing, suicide, on a certain extent, is not at all one's act of self-inflicting harm. Its, in fact, society's act towards an individual which has a weak defense against him/her-self. They're afterall, victims of society, victims of abuse. Abuse which has no competition, manipulation of the emotion and mind.

This one's for the book writer, the detention lover, and the funny ones.

This one is for the teachers that have taught me, and everyone else. This one is for every single kind of teacher who have taught in schools. This, this is from the students. Let's get to the point. In school, there are teachers that everyone love, hate, enjoy or find boring. There are teachers who are strict, friendly, lazy, and over confident. There are also teachers who we barely see (sometimes we don't even know they exist) if they don't teach us, or ones who we all know about, even if they don't teach us.

There are many varieties of people in this world of course. You see, other than friends or celebrities, there are also teachers. To their life, it is their backbone, their source of income, and in times, happiness. To our life, they are the building blocks. They teach, we learn. We leave school, we forget them, but we never forget the lessons learnt. We use the lessons to push ourselves forward in life. They are our hope.

Of course, like I've mentioned, there are many kinds of teachers, but this, this is to the ones everyone love, and to the one that teaches us rather normally.

I'll start with the norm. How do we learn? Teachers teach us right? They give us questions, teach the materials, then we work out the answers. That's how teachers normally teach, they pass on their knowledge through planned sessions through out a school year. They plan their lessons, apply their materials, and let the students do the work. If a student don't understand, they expect the student to come up to them and ask them. That is basically how a teacher should work in auto mode. Here's the thing, over time, years of studying, these kinds of teachers are so common you get bored of them. You don't hate them, you just get bored of the way things are being taught. Lazy students will eventually drop low on their grades, while the excelling students teach themselves. That's the effect of a normal teacher.

What is the second one? The second one is the ones that are friendly, okay maybe sometimes not, but you just love their subject. To the ones that do not teach us by applying materials, but by using our individual abilities and applying the material evenly towards the class. This is to the teachers who do not teach us, but inherit their knowledge to our self-being. To be honest, there are many many ways as to how these teachers inherit their work, but one thing for sure, these teachers make us remember every thing they have taught us, and just love the subject. Some may tend to be a young, new teacher who still knows their way around kids our age, or others just don't grow old with in them. They stay in their own era that adapts to time, and then apply their adaptations and teach kids. Others, they just love kids. I don't really know how I'd turn out if I teach, but I love kids (you people of age, this is not pedophilia I tell you. Ha!) They are just unique in their ways, innocent in their head. Before, what we call society, dawns upon them and break them.

That's off topic, so here, this one's for all the teachers in the world. Many, forgotten.

When you're stuck forever.

You know how several times I've come across how things will tend to change, or people changing. Well now, moving away from that, it's not about moving on and leaving people who changed, or leaving a situation because it changed.. but in fact changing the situation or yourself, towards a person that constantly changes.
I am barely of any age, but if I jump to conclusion I think I can get to it as accurate as I can.

A bonded promise. A guarantee. A bond. We know this kind of... Transaction as marriage. Of course I refer to one that lasts, not a stupid one night love and get married, but a built up of emotions that leads to years, to families. How then, this so common phenomena, can marriage last?

Despite all that I have mentioned about all the changes in people, and what is love, I believe that this is all simple. People change, yes. Situation changes, yes. What the two people does is that, over time, they cope with each other's changes. Either they adapt to the other's changes, or pull the other to avoid a certain change. This is one of those unspoken promises or self-realisation that in a lot of events happen, but this one works gradually and gets stronger by the day of being together. There is always times of argument, but that is just human nature.

Now the title might imply something of the negative, but really, it isn't. Who wouldn't love to be stuck to someone they love the rest of their lives?